Even though they are close relations, there is an enormous gulf separating these two emotions, and you confuse them at your peril.

But as people discover every day, confusion is easy because they both trigger the pleasure centers in your brain. A chemical called dopamine is released producing euphoria, extra energy, sleeplessness, and avid attention on your loved one. Physiologically it’s a lot like taking opium. But there’s a difference …

Lust generally steals away like a thief in the night after sex and might, or might not, return sometime later. What’s more you can lust after several people at the same time. But when you’re in love, you are completely focused on just one person, and your feelings for them don’t evaporate after sex. They often become even stronger.

But you do have to be careful during sex, because you might think you’ve fallen in love! The reason is that after orgasm dopamine activity reaches its peak, and people can mistake the intense physical pleasure they’re experiencing for actual emotional connection and love, which as many people have found out the hard way, can lead to tears further down the track.

That’s one very good reason why in our new guide to everything you need to know about finding true love called First Date Magic’ we strongly advise a ‘no sex’ policy on first dates. No matter how great the date has been, or how gorgeous he or she may be, don’t jump into bed on the first night – and probably not the second or third either. It will cloud your judgment at a time when you need to be seeing 20/20.

Remember when you’re dating you need to keep control of the situation – and passion and control are two completely conflicting things. Anyway, if they are right for you, a little sweet anticipation will only improve the fireworks to come.

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Love at first sight is the stuff of a million romance novels and countless Hollywood movies. But is it really possible to fall in love within milli-seconds of seeing someone for the first time, or is it just a true love fantasy that’s so magical that we are desperate to believe it is real?

Well if you’re looking for a definite answer, we’re sorry to say that’s going to be a bit tricky, because the reality is that the answer isn’t cut and dried. The closest you can come is to say – ‘sort of’. And it’s a guy thing. In our great new book on making true love appear in your life called ‘First Date Magic’ love at first sight is discussed in detail. In a nutshell, here’s what we say.

The first thing to understand is that the ‘love at first sight’ phenomenon is more akin to lust than love. It’s the instinct that makes you turn and watch a pretty girl walk past in the street, then forget her moments later, when someone else just as pretty goes pat the other way.

You see it’s all a throwback to our caveman ancestors who just needed a quick look at the hottie from the next cave to kick-start the mating process. In those days you never knew when you were going to be eaten by something big and fierce, so time was precious.

Even now, men seem to fall in love faster than women. It’s not that men’s standards are lower it’s just that they have much simpler criteria when it comes to rating a potential mate.

Men tend to be attracted to women who display youth and beauty, (which equates to fertility and healthy offspring), and explains why guys usually marry women who are younger than they are. What’s more lots of guys also have a ‘Knight in Shining Armor Complex’ and are drawn to women who look like they might ‘need’ them. Men want to be helpful and solve problems.

On the other hand women are generally a lot more choosey and take a lot longer to decide if they want to see a man for a second date. Women’s more complex dating criteria gives them a much longer list to tick off. For example women often value money, status, and ambition more than good looks. In fact, research in America recently found that women look for financial security twice as much as men do.

So boys look out for gold-diggers, and girls think carefully about what you want, because you just might get it.

We suggest that both men and women need to be a lot more thoughtful about what they want from a relationship, and good long look before they take the plunge.

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The idea of there being one special person in the whole wide world created just for you is incredibly romantic. We imagine the wordless communication, the limitless understanding, the unconditional acceptance, and undying support, and know in our very core that somewhere out there, that person is waiting. What’s more, for confirmation we only have to switch on the radio. Every third song from ‘Unchained Melody’ to U2’s ‘One’ is about the true love that’s only possible with a single, perfect, unique individual.

And even though it is a wonderful fantasy to have, we know it’s actually completely realistic to expect that one day you will be with someone who is absolutely right for you – you can have a ‘soul mate’ or your ‘one and only’.

But before you can find true love you need to know the sort of person you’re looking for. So it’s worth spending a few weeks out of the dating loop to reflect on your past successes and failures, and also to develop a very clear picture of what you want in the future. You often hear of business mentors and success coaches talking about the need for businesses to have a five year plan and so on. Well your romantic life is no different. You need to know where you want to be in five, ten, fifteen years from now, and have a good idea of who you’d like to be there with.

But having said that it’s important to be realistic. Here’s what I mean.

I might tell you that nothing less than a fellow like this will do for me:

‘I want a 35 to 39 year old 6’1” lawyer or doctor in private practice, who has his own yacht, plays an instrument, owns a holiday house, travels to France, has nice hair and is good at tennis’.

It’s great to have standards, and so you should. We’re definitely not saying you should even consider dating people who lack qualities you value, or don’t find attractive. The point is that when you set your Dating Criteria, it should be possible for other people to meet it.

So while it’s very clear who I’m after, it’s also clear I’m dreaming. How many single men actually fit the bill?

I must also think about myself too. Am I herself honestly going to be a comfortable match for a man like that? If I happened to be a chain-smoking, high-school dropout with no career ambition and hates going outdoors in the sun, then I’m dreaming. Finding true love is about getting the matching right. You need to meet your own criteria too, or you’re going to be very frustrated, and eventually very lonely.

You’ve probably heard the old one about ‘opposites attract’, but as far as finding true love goes there’s nothing further from the truth. If you’re going to have a relationship that lasts, you need to find a perfect match. The only way to do that is to be yourself, be sensible and be realistic. If you do that you’ll have a much better chance of having great dates with people whose company you’ll enjoy.

So back to me and my quest for true love. I would be much better off broadening my dating criteria to something like this:

I’d like to meet a taller than average man, with a university education, who enjoys music, sports, being on the water and travelling.

These dating criteria are still nice and tight, but it gives me a lot more scope. Who’s to say that a 41 year old 5’11 software designer who surfs and has a fantastic record collection wouldn’t turn out to be the love of my life!

So if you’re looking for love, know what you want, but stay open-minded and flexible, and one day very soon it will appear for you. (And that advice works for more than just finding a date).

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Here is one of the strangest mysteries of the dating world. Why is it that nice girls like dating bad boys? The devilish attraction of Bad Boys has been immortalized in movies and songs ever since ‘Spartacus’ and ‘The Leader of the Pack’. Recently millions of women worldwide have swooned over a criminal George Clooney and co in Oceans 11, 12 and 13. And how about Tony Soprano – although he’s no pin-up, the power he projects on screen means there’s no shortage of females in his fan club either. You imagine he could just click his fingers and Angelina Jolie would be at his side … fighting off Megan Fox, and Jessica Alba.
In our new book on making true love appear in your life, called ‘First Date Magic’ we answer this question once and for all.
When you think about it, it’s obvious. Women like confidence in men and ‘bad boys’ have confidence to burn. They are self-assured, do what they want, follow their own path and answer to no man. Because they don’t conform, they’re unpredictable, mysterious and utterly magnetic. In fact, their personality is their strong suit. Bad Boys don’t even have to be particularly good looking to get the girl. They can get by on the sheer force of their wicked, rebellious charisma alone.

The pay off for a bad boy’s woman is an interesting relationship, full of thrills and the challenge of keeping their bad boy interested. Even if it’s hard work from time to time, life is never dull.

So where does that leave the average guy who doesn’t want to smash up cars and can’t get time off work to set up daring jewel heists in Paris?

Well luckily for you, you don’t have to be heading for the slammer to catch a girl’s eye, you just need is some of that bad boy confidence. And like Tony Soprano and George Clooney you can just act like you have it. Acting the Bad Boy is a great way to attract great dates, especially in places like bars, clubs and at parties. By the way, if you’re out with your mates, why not all try the Bad Boy strategy, and move a crew. It’s fun, and above all you’ll see that’s it’s a sure fire way to attract great girls, and not just the bad ones.
Acting like a Bad Boy is actually very easy. Here’s is the step-by-step guide to looking like a card carry member of the bad boys club.
Smile; it makes you look relaxed and in control.
Take your time; the world marches to the beat of your drum.
Walk tall and with purpose; you know where you’re going and what you want – and you want whatever looks best.
Breathe deeply and slowly; it looks calm and assured.
Talk clearly but never loudly or boastfully; you know you’re cool and you’ve got the goods.
Look everyone in the eye; you’re the best man in the room and you ain’t afraid of nothin’.
Keep an air of mystery about you – let the other people fill in some of the blanks about your life. If they ask if you’ve done time in the big house, just smile to yourself, say nothing and let their minds go into overdrive.

The point is, Bad Boys don’t actually ever have to do anything bad. They just have to look as if one day they might.

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Sooner or later, months or even years after separation, breakup or divorce, most single parents eventually decide that they want to have the warm of adult love back in their life. However despite what you might think your children can actually give you a major advantage when looking for love. It sounds crazy, but it’s true. In our new book on making true love appear in your life, called ‘First Date Magic’ we explain exactly why kids can help your love life.

Of course we are realistic. Kids certainly do place limitations on your dating activity, especially on your time, but that can be dramatically out-weighed by the quality of person that you could end up with.

You don’t need anyone to tell you that running a family single-handed is tough, but by the same token, it can also be seen as very a impressive skill by prospective dates. In other words, having great kids gives you an equally great CV. It shows you are organized, responsible, caring, nurturing and independent – all things that plenty of people out there prize very highly, especially as they reach their thirties and look for more substantial relationships.

The other thing to remember is that there are a lot of people in the same boat as you – single parents of the opposite sex. It’s often much easier to date someone who understands your situation and the demands kids make on your time and energy.

So if you’re feeling ready to meet someone new, don’t let your children hold you back.

What’s more, technology has made finding new love easy for single parents! The internet is the answer to single parents’ prayers. You don’t have to go to parties or bars anymore. Your local introductions website lets you check out prospective dates after the kids are in bed. What’s more dating websites give you a wealth of information about prospective dates. For example, their online profile should give you excellent clues about their attitude to children (i.e. do they want more, are they keen on making a blended family etc). Then you can get to know more about them via messaging on the site, and decide whether meeting them in person is worth a few hours of your precious free time.

If you do decide a First Date in person is in order, here are a few things to keep in mind the first time you meet.

1. Don’t talk about your children too much.

The first date is all about getting to know each other, not exchanging stories about the kids.

2. Keep your dating criteria in mind. Try not to get too caught up in the novelty of the situation. The person on the other side of the table has to measure up if they are going to be worth investing time and money on as you get to know them better.

3. Don’t let your children stand in the way. Your kids are used to having you all to themselves, so when you say you’re going out for the evening they can feel that it’s robbing them of attention. But as long as you’re not abandoning them with bread and water for dinner while you’re gallivanting around town, it’s perfectly OK to go out and have some adult fun. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad parent. In fact, it could be quite the opposite. If dating makes you happier, it makes a happier home for everyone.

However, before you go out on your date it might be a good time to talk to your children and explain to them that while you’re going to spending time with someone else it doesn’t mean you love them any less – it’s just that grown-ups need friends too. A little reassurance might be all they need.

And if your first date goes well and you decide that romance is in the air, there are five things that you can do to help everyone get used to the idea of having new people around the place:

1. Don’t force your children to like your date. This is a recipe for disaster. Give them all the time they need to naturally develop a relationship.

2. Don’t expect your children to automatically like their children. If your kids have issues with your date, they’re likely to have a problem with their kids too. The best way to start is to meet your date’s children first, and then introduce your own children to them another time. Take things slowly, and remember they don’t have to become like long lost siblings from the very second they meet.

3. Your date will need time to feel comfortable with your kids.

4. Stay aware of your children’s feelings. Give them the reassurance and special attention they need to feel secure. Remind them that you have more than enough love in your heart for everyone.

5. Remember there is a balance between your family life and dating. There are times when your children have to come first, and your date must accept that. If they can’t, then sadly, it must be adios baby! You can always get another date, but your kids are your kids forever.
And this last point is perhaps the biggest and most important advantage to having kids when you’re dating.

If you stay true to yourself and to your kids, the person who gives you what you need to keep on being a great parent while you’re dating, will most likely also be a wonderful person to spend your life with too.

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When you’re out there in the dating jungle, sooner or later you’re going to encounter the scariest creature of all – rejection. But it doesn’t have to be so scary, and you’re about to find out how.

First let’s consider the lucky people don’t seem to worry about rejection. It’s all about their attitude. They realize that not all people will be for them, and also that they won’t always time their approach right – sometimes people are just not in the right frame of mind to be asked on a date.

It’s all tied up with good self esteem as we explain in ‘First Date Magic’ our new book on dating and making true love appear for you.

People with good self esteem instinctively know that they won’t win every time, and so they don’t take rejection personally. They just brush it off, see that no permanent physical damage has been done, and get on with finding someone who does want to get to know them better.

But if that’s not you (yet) it’s important to be aware of the reasons why you fear being rejected.

As silly as it seems it’s quite common for people to bring rejection on themselves by expecting it before they even get started.

Another way you bring rejection on yourself is if you’re still carrying the emotional baggage from past bad relationships, where you’ve suffered rejection.

It usually goes something like this: ‘if they didn’t want me, why would anyone else?’ What you must do is remind yourself that every relationship is different. What happened once doesn’t have to keep happening … unless of course you persist in dating the wrong sort of person, which is exactly what millions of people do.

You also need to keep in mind that timing plays a big part in how your request for a date will be received.

Here’s a typical example. Imagine you’re a guy and you approach a woman who’s just met a bunch of her friends. You politely ask her to have a drink with you. But in all likelihood she’s probably going to say no, even if she likes what she sees. She’ll either be too embarrassed, or think it’s rude to abandon her pals. But if you’d waited a while and been more casual in your approach, the answer might easily been ‘yes’.

But whatever the reason is rejection can still sting, so here are six ways that you can get over it faster and get on with meeting someone else.

Don’t take it personally. There are plenty of reasons you might get rejected that have absolutely nothing to do with you. You might remind them of someone they don’t like, the timing might be wrong, they might be in a relationship already, or they might be having a break from dating for awhile.

Leave them to it. Don’t hang around looking sulky or sad. Stand up tall, walk away with a smile, and get on with life. Who knows it might make them think that they’ve just missed out on something really good, and come after you.

Realize that it could have been a ‘defensive rejection’. Some people will reject you just to get in first. Often people like this are hiding serious self esteem issues behind a veil of toughness and aggression. They expect eventual rejection, so they try and protect their own feelings if they think that you might be too good for them.

Keep swinging. Just dust yourself off and try again. Meeting people is actually a lot of fun, and one day you’re sure to meet the right person – maybe it will be today!

Think of it as a narrow escape. They might have turned out to be wrong for you anyway, and if they rejected you, they probably were. How foolish they are to be blind to your charms.

Make it up to yourself. Have a deal going where if you get rejected, you buy yourself something nice or spoil yourself in another way. Turn it into a win-win situation! Just don’t make the ‘making up’ better than getting a date – remember you’re out there to add the joy of love to your life, not to collect self-bought gifts.

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We’ve all been there. The sudden loss of confidence when we look in the mirror and decide we’re fat. And it’s worse if that moment comes just a few short hours before you’re due out on your first date with someone great. However rescue is in sight. From our new book on first dates and finding true love ‘First Date Magic’, here are 10 simple tricks to make you look thinner and create a fabulous first impression.

Trick 1. Wear clothes that fit. It seems like a no brainer, but a lot of people insist on squeezing themselves into things that are too small – probably to delude themselves that they are skinnier than they really are. Anyway whatever the reason, whether you are a size 8 or a size 18, if you wear the wrong size clothes, you’ll end up looking bigger than you are. Wearing clothes that are too tight leads to bulges and lumps, just as clothes which are too large can make you look flabby. Try things on before you buy them, and don’t let vanity get in the way!

Trick 2. Wear disguises. To make your tummy look flatter, ditch the skintight vest and go for a fitted tunic. Instead of a mini skirt, hide chunky thighs under a mid-length floaty skirt.
And remember, thongs and g-strings are fine if you have no fat to hide, but if you want to give the illusion of a trim body, go for something supportive, which helps pull in your tummy. A well fitted bra can also help to create a smoother, slimmer figure.

Trick 3. Highlight your good bits! If you have a slender neck, but carry bit of extra weight on your waistline, draw attention to your neck with an eye catching necklace. If you have toned arms, wear a sleeveless top to make the most of them.

Trick 4. Walk tall. Stand up straight, suck in your gut, lift up your pelvis and pull your shoulder blades back and down. Remember the old book balanced on the head while walking trick – try it! The book shouldn’t fall off! And whenever you get the chance, look in the mirror and make sure you are not hunched over. This is possibly the MOST important tip, because bad posture creates the illusion of extra weight.

Trick 5. Wear black. Black slims everyone. It reduces a pot-belly, shrinks muffins and love handles, and can be dressed up with colored belts and jewelry. And contrary to popular belief bigger people can wear bright colored clothes, as long as they work with their body shape and fit properly.

Trick 6. Wear vertical stripes.Vertical lines give the illusion of slimness, but watch out – horizontal lines do the opposite. And always go for slender stripes, because broad stripes can make you look big. What’s more, tight clingy vertical stripes accentuate every blip and bulge. For guys, pinstriped formal shirts look great and are slimming too.

Trick 7. Accessories. Never wear anything shiny or bright over an area you’re trying to hide.

Trick 8. Trouser tips. Straight legged, or slightly boot cut trousers create an unbroken line down your leg, making you look taller and hence skinnier. Peg legs make a round bottom look like bigger. Boot cut pants balance out the rear. Go for side or rear fastenings if you are a girl. Front flies make your stomach bulge.
Trousers must be the right length. Too short makes you look like your clothes are too small (or you are too big!) and too long makes you seem shorter than you really are.

Trick 9. Top tops. Go for bell-shaped sleeves if you have big arms. A universally flattering style of top is the “empire” cut. This cut has a band or something right below the bust. It makes the tummy look flat and helps draw the eye upward toward your face.
However, be careful because if the band of the top sits on your bust rather than below it, the effect is negative instead of positive. So make sure you pick an empire cut that fits.

Trick 10. Divided you fall. Try not to divide your body into sections, for example chest, torso, and legs. Instead make it look like one unit. Dresses and matching colors can make you look taller, and therefore slimmer.

So there you are, with a little clever dressing know-how you can drop inconvenient kilos as if by magic, and be on your way to a great first date and a fabulous first impression is just about guaranteed.

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When you join a dating or matchmaking website, you have three main chances to create a fabulous impression on other members. These are your photo; the headline of your profile; and the profile itself. (There’s actually one more, but we’ll get to that soon).

First let’s look at your photo. Because physical appearance is so important when you’re looking for love, you need to make sure it’s a nice one.
You need a good quality shot, meaning that it’s well lit, in focus and nicely composed – chest and shoulders is perfect. And don’t have anyone else in the picture – it’s all about you. The camera in your phone probably won’t cut it, so use a decent digital camera of at least 3.2 MP and size the photo to at least 640 x 480 pixels for upload to the site.
Be nicely dressed and smile! If you look happy and full of life you’ll look a million times more attractive than the people who use moody-arty type shots.

Next is the headline. Here you get a few words (usually up to about ten words) to give people a quick idea of what you’re about. Remember you need to stand out from the hundreds or thousands of other people on the site and write something which will inspire browsing members to click on the link to your profile.

Then once they’ve clicked through, there is your online profile where you have a couple of hundred words to sell your wonderful self.

The trick here is to make it seem like you’re not trying too hard.

You want to appear like someone who already has a great life, and simply needs to meet an equally wonderful person to put the icing on the cake. If you look like you’ve got a rewarding, full life you’ll attract people easily, because they want to share in the fun

The best idea is to start with something interesting that you’ve done or do, and build from there. You don’t need to write it like your CV and turn it into a tedious list. Just pick a few good bits from your life which you think are important for potential dates to know about. You’ll probably want to mention your job, interests and hobbies, a bit about your family (like if you have kids), and anything else that you enjoy. Be positive and don’t be too shy. And let your achievements speak for themselves. Don’t write, ‘I live for excitement’, instead casually mention that you are a member of the local bull fighting club. Having said that don’t brag or exaggerate. You’ll just look like a fool.

Negativity is a big turn-off too. Avoid things like ‘I feel weird writing about myself’ or ‘I’m not really very interesting, but here goes anyway’ – you’ll only seem weak and dull.

Just keep it real and always, always, always tell the truth! In Russia they have a very good saying ‘a lie can take you forward, but it will never let you go back’. If you make things up to try and impress people, eventually you will be caught out – and lose all their trust. Let your sincerity come shining through.

And there’s one last trick that many people overlook – the user name. This is the nickname that you are known by to other members of the site. It’s supposed to protect your anonymity – however it’s also another golden opportunity to reflect your brilliant personality and make yourself look fun, witty, interesting and/or cool. So give your user name some serious thought and see if you can come up with something that suits you, and also helps you stand-out from the crowd. A great example is a fashion designer friend who knew she had a slight punctuality problem – she called herself ‘Fashionably Late’.

Dating websites are huge right now. The latest estimate is that 40% of people have had at least one first date with someone they met online.

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Once you’ve registered on your local dating or matchmaking site you’ll soon start sparking the interest of other members – yippee, somebody out there likes you! But it’s important to resist the temptation to reply in a gush of gratitude and relief. You need to be cool and reel in your fish carefully. Being too enthusiastic just looks desperate. Some people even advise that you should never reply to messages at night or on the weekend.
In our book ‘First Date Magic’ we suggest that might be a little extreme, but it will certainly help give you an air of mystery, which is a good thing.

Probably a more realistic option is not to respond too quickly – give it at least four to six hours, and never reply on the same day to messages received after 5pm. You’ll keep them on their toes, but still keep the ball rolling if they look interesting.

What’s more, it’s a good idea to minimize the time you spend online browsing for potential dates. The reason is that other users of your dating site can usually see if you’re logged in when they’re looking at your profile and if they spot you online too often, that looks desperate too.

So take it slow and when you reply, politely thank them for their interest and ask them a question or two that occurred to you when you read their profile. However this is also the time to stop contact if you aren’t interested in them. Just let them know politely that you don’t think you would be compatible (no explanation necessary) and wish them well.

But if things progress you’ll probably trade a few messages over several days while you decide whether you’d like to meet them offline, or in other words the ‘old school’ way – on a date.

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First dates where you do something physical (but not that physical!) are getting more and more popular, and we have a list of great suggestions in our new book on First Dates and making true love appear in your life, called ‘First Date Magic’. In ‘First Date Magic’ we explain that action dates work very well for a couple of reasons.

For one thing, if you’re doing something physical there is often a legitimate excuse for touching your date, say clutching each other in fright on the rollercoaster, or even pushing each other on the swings in the park. This kind of casual, ‘safe’, spontaneous contact helps create a feeling of closeness and intimacy.

The terror inducing rollercoaster ride has another positive benefit too. When you get an adrenalin surge your body responds in a way that’s very like sexual arousal – your pulse rate shoots up and you get flushed and breathless. And it’s very easy to subconsciously confuse it for sexual attraction. Why? – because it’s physiologically almost identical to the first stage of sexual arousal.

The good news for you is that any activity that’s new, fun and exciting can produce this effect – taking a surfing lesson together, indoor rock climbing, ice skating, even eating hot, spicy food, can have similar results! We’ve even heard about an experiment where people met on a bridge high above rushing water. It turned out that they were more attracted to each other than similar people who met elsewhere.

So if you can find a rollercoaster on a bridge, from which you can tandem bungy-jump down to a restaurant serving hot Thai Green curry, we can just about guarantee that your date will fall for you!

Of course you don’t have to stop there, there are limitless First Date ideas, and thinking them up can be fun and a great exercise for your imagination.

For inspiration, it pays to keep an eye on the newspaper to see what’s happening in your area. Interesting local events make great First Dates. But nothing makes a First Date great like you do.

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Of course action dates aren’t the only option you need to have up your sleeve. But don’t worry, we’ve thought of them all for you. We have many, many more great first date ideas in First Date Magic. So get into action, and take look at First Date Magic now at (insert your ClickBank FDM affiliate link here).

Unless you were born funny and brilliant with a million amazing things to say, there might be the odd gap in conversation during your date. Of course you can always just pepper the other person with questions all night and let them do all the talking, but that will just tire them out and leave them feeling that they never got to know you (unless they are self-absorbed, in which case they’ll love the chance to talk about themselves non-stop).

And that goes for you too. Avoid at all costs trying to force your views on your date. Be passionate and enthusiastic by all means, but don’t bang on about your pet topic all night long. What you need is a nice wide range of interesting things lined up to talk about, other than your own life story.

As we point out in our new book on First Dates and making true love appear in your life, called ‘First Date Magic’ the aim of early dates is to use the ebb and flow of conversation to establish common ground and get a feeling for what the other person is all about. All it takes is a little prep time before the date.

Practice your best lines and anecdotes on friends, family, or even in front of a mirror so that you can pull them out when you hit an awkward silence or just want to make an impression. Just knowing you have these lines at the ready will give you more confidence and assurance the whole evening.

Here a just a few of the clever ways we suggest in First Date Magic to fill your mind with excellent topics for First Date conversation (we also have a list of dozens of conversation starters to help you if you get tongue-tied or go blank!)

The first thing to do is read the day’s news. Do it everyday. Be informed about the big stories and know enough to have a reasonable opinion – and remember ALL stories have at least two sides to consider. Parroting back one point of view only makes you seem closed-minded and set in your ways (not attractive).

Use Google. Look up Google Trends to see what the rest of world currently finds interesting. You can also set up iGoogle as your home page and add an amazing array of news feeds on everything from Variety to BBC News.

Another smart thing you can do with iGoogle is see what a range of smart celebs and important opinion leaders from all over the world have on their home page, and grab their stuff for yours. Ashton Kutcher gave me the idea to add the Joke of the Day to my iGoogle. Add a DIGG feed too, while you’re at it – there’s so much interesting stuff out there, and the more of it you’re exposed to, the more interesting you will be.

Anyway you get the idea. Just tuck away good stuff to talk about, and then pull it out when the conversation needs a boost – but you don’t have to blurt it all out, just because it’s in there. Use it wisely, and you’ll seem like a person who’s active, smart, worldly, well informed and stimulating to be around (which are very attractive things to be).

RESOURCE BOX.
But there’s so much more we can tell you. And it’s all in First Date Magic. For all the ideas and advice you need to have your best first dates ever and find the true love you deserve, see First Date Magic now at (insert your ClickBank FDM affiliate link here).

One of the things that stresses people out about going on the first date happens near the end. It’s the prospect of second date, and will there be one or not? Or do they even want one! In our new book ‘First Date Magic’ – everything you need to know about first dates and making true love appear in you life – we explore this important topic in detail.
We found that there are a number of clear signs, that the other person would be keen to see you again. Here are some of the main ones:

The date didn’t finish a lot earlier than planned.
You both maintained eye contact, and weren’t distracted by other people.
Conversation flowed easily back and forth, with neither of you dominated the talk.
You felt comfortable with the other person, and relaxed more and more as the date went on.
If they saw someone they knew, they introduced you.
They talked about something that they like, that they’d like you to do or see too.
They complimented you.
They told you how much they enjoyed themselves.
They said they’d call (or email) and specified when.

And if you say you’ll call. CALL! Don’t be cruel and leave people hanging. Be honest and have the courage to respect their feelings. It’s far kinder to tell someone immediately if you don’t think there’s a future for the two of you. Leading them on because you can’t tell them straight is not cool.

Of course there is another side of the first date coin. Here are some signs that the first date is probably also the last:

One of you was very late.
Conversation was awkward and mostly one-way.
You found nothing in common.
No secrets were shared.
One of you talked a lot about their ex.
They phoned or texted during the date.
They cut the date short on some lame excuse.
They seemed bored.
They hid from people they knew.

If any of these things happened, then sorry to say it’s better to cut your losses, and start looking for someone new. It was just never meant to be.

RESOURCE BOX.
But let’s not get ahead of ourselves, to have a second date, first you need to find a great person to take out on a first date. And that’s exactly what First Date Magic is all about. First Date Magic is packed with everything you need to know, and you can find out much more right now at (insert your ClickBank FDM affiliate link here).

Unless you have religious or other strong personal convictions that prevent it, sex is part of most romantic relationships. However we’re not going to get into any of that here – all we’re concerned with is whether it’s a good idea or not to sleep with somebody on the first, or even second date.

And unless sex is all you want from your date, the answer is a resounding no! In fact, we think it’s a very bad idea even to talk about it on the first date, let alone hint that you might quite like it.

So stay vertical, keep your pants on and concentrate on getting to know each other first.

The promise of sex sometime in the future is part of your mystery and allure, and is therefore extremely valuable for keeping your potential true love on the hook in the early stages. If you’re a girl, never forget that men are hunters and anticipation is all part of the thrill. So be sexy without being too obvious, slutty or acting like a sleazy player. Just smolder away quietly, hinting wordlessly of the passionate storm to come.

Also never talk about your exes. Nothing good can ever come of it. You don’t want your sexual history to become an issue this early on.

If your date pressures you in any way for sex, don’t see them again. There’s no excuse for that kind of behavior. Likewise a kiss does not mean sex is next on the menu. And is a kiss OK? Yes but probably best to restrict a first date kiss to a peck on the cheek – friendly, but not too friendly.

It’s all about keeping control on your first date, to make sure you can see with complete clarity if all the necessary elements of true love are falling into place.

RESOURCE BOX.
Of course there is much to know about having great early dates and making true love appear for you. And that’s where First Date Magic comes in. So before you make a move you’ll regret, learn all about First Date Magic now at (insert your ClickBank FDM affiliate link here).